The emotional and financial journey of a mother’s home

For many women, buying a home is more than a financial milestone—it’s an emotional one. It’s about safety, stability, and the desire to leave something meaningful behind. But for mothers, especially those navigating homeownership on their own, the journey is layered with both pride and pressure.

According to a 2024 report by Lightstone, women are the leading force in South Africa’s residential property market, owning 38% of homes compared to 29% owned by men. At face value, the numbers reflect progress. But zoom in, and a more complex story emerges—one shaped by caregiving responsibilities, financial strain, and the emotional weight of turning a house into a home.

The reality, according to Stats SA, is that 45.4% of South African children live with only their mothers. Just 4.2% live with only their fathers. The burden—financial and emotional—often falls on women.

Esther Devar, a financial adviser at Momentum Financial Planning (MFP), sees this firsthand.

“Whether single, widowed, or supporting families on their own, mothers need to be especially vigilant about the long-term financial implications of owning a home,” says Devar.

Owning a home isn’t just about qualifying for a loan. It’s about navigating a future full of unexpected costs and risks—often alone.

“Homeownership represents stability and legacy,” she adds. “But it comes with responsibilities far beyond the initial purchase price. You’re dealing with debt, credit, interest rates, and an unpredictable world. It’s enough to make anyone’s head spin, especially when there are often more immediate responsibilities to take care of.”

When Dreams Come with Debt
While the dream of owning property is powerful, the reality can be financially overwhelming—particularly in a country where debt remains a survival tool. The 2024 Q4 DebtBusters Debt Index reveals that many South Africans are relying on unsecured credit and personal loans just to cover basic expenses.

For single mothers or primary caregivers already managing a bond, this can create a cycle of constant financial pressure.

“Preparedness is key,” says Devar. “People underestimate the importance of building a buffer into their budget. It’s not just about affording the monthly bond; it’s about affording the life that comes with the house.”

The First Step Is Financial Readiness
Before applying for a bond, Devar recommends mothers focus on their financial foundation: improving credit scores, settling debt, and saving for a sizeable deposit.

“You don’t want to be a slave to your bond,” she explains. “A larger deposit reduces your monthly repayments and can help you secure better interest rates, which is especially important when lenders are cautious due to high interest rates.”

Getting pre-approved for a loan can also give buyers an edge—especially for women who may face challenges like income disparities or unconscious bias during negotiations. It’s a signal to sellers that you’re not just interested—you’re financially ready.

Know What You’re Really Buying Into
For Devar, knowledge is power—especially when it comes to property. She urges women to ask detailed questions before buying: What are the real costs? Is the area safe? Will this be affordable in the long term?

“Ask as many questions as you need,” she advises. “Whether it’s about neighbourhood safety, the condition of the property, or the total cost of ownership, make sure you’re working with professionals who give you straight answers.”

Safety, in particular, is a top concern for women—often guiding decisions about living in secure complexes or near family and schools. These considerations are valid and essential, but they can also impact the long-term affordability of a home.

Protect What Matters Most
Once the keys are in hand, the journey isn’t over. Protecting that investment—and your peace of mind—should be the next priority. Devar recommends securing home insurance and establishing a financial safety net.

“A financial adviser can help you choose the right insurance cover and build an emergency fund,” she says. “This usually entails saving six months’ worth of living expenses in an access bond to serve as a financial lifeline during tough times, hopefully avoiding the drama behind high-interest personal loans or missed bond payments.”

A Legacy of Security
For mothers, a home is often more than a structure—it’s a symbol of independence, safety, and love. But to truly turn a house into a haven, financial security must come first.

“Speak to a financial adviser before making any major decision,” Devar concludes. “The right plan will protect your home and your peace of mind while you take care of what matters most.”

Because in the end, homeownership isn’t just about the bond. It’s about the life you’re building inside those walls—for yourself, and for the next generation.